Thoughts on Life

 I have been a little fascinated with This story. This couple just had a baby that was a frozen embryo that had been frozen over 30 years. Births resulting from frozen embryos fascinate me. I always think that the person will spend their life thinking that they “should have been” X amount of years older than they are. I followed a mommy blogger who had a baby that was an embryo frozen for 7 years. When he was born, I thought this exact thing. I said to myself, when he’s in 5th grade, he’s going to think he should be graduating from high school, and so on with every other age. 

30 years is like wow. It brings new meaning to the saying, “I was born in the wrong generation.”  The embryo was frozen in November of 1994.  If it had been done in the natural way, 9 months after November of 1994 would have been August of 1995. So he should be celebrating his 30th birthday this month, but he’s a newborn.  

It’s almost like Limbo on Earth.  What if they get to the end of life, say about 90 years old, and think, “I would be 120 now so I wouldn’t even be here right this moment if I hadn’t been frozen.”  It’s daunting.  

However, if I could. I really would “adopt” one.  I regret not having more kids.  I don’t think my husband is fertile.  But I’m too old to be pregnant.  I know some women have done it successfully, but I’m not sure I could handle it at this age.  Ten years of panic attacks did a lot of damage to my body, and I don’t think I could carry a baby to term.  It would be amazing though, to have another child.  I would retire the same year they graduate from high school.  And my husband would be nearly 80.

When I was in high school, I had a classmate whose father was 80.  We were in our junior year, and he was 80 years old and having a lot of health problems and most likely put on hospice.  Her father was a Mormon polygamist and had five wives and 25 children. My classmate was the youngest of 25 children.  I remember his health problems as a result of aging were really stressing her out.  No one knew what to tell her though, because no one else at the age of 16 had 80 year old parents.  She had two half sisters that were older than her mom.  I remember asking her how many nieces and nephews she had total, but she didn’t know.  She knew how many she had from her mom’s kids, but not the others- except she did know that one of the half sisters older than her mom had 15 kids.  Stories like that fascinate me.  Her father must have spent considerable time with her despite having so much responsibility.  I know he must have had a decent relationship with her because of how distressed she was with his normal aging process.  I wouldn’t want a kid to go through that.  My mom is 80 now- it wouldn’t be good for a teenager to deal with that.  

I am still panged with regret over not having more kids.  My one daughter is amazing, and I know if she had younger siblings from my side, they’d be just as awesome.  But, I have to accept that it happened for a reason.  Depression runs in my family. Perhaps my hypothetical second or third children would have struggled their whole lives more than I could imagine.  I don’t know.  I did know a woman once whose son took his own life. She said if someone had told her he would struggle so much, she would have had an abortion.  That’s not a nice story, but it really happened  The Bible says this in Ecclesiastes:

"So I returned, and considered all the oppressions that are done under the sun: and behold the tears of such as were oppressed, and they had no comforter; and on the side of their oppressors there was power; but they had no comforter.And I declared that the dead, who had already died, are happier than the living, who are still alive.But better than both is the one who has never been born, who has not seen the evil that is done under the sun" 

It’s worth considering. I like to imagine that if I had more kids, they’d all be as happy and amazing as Anna, but that also may not have been the case and the universe or God knew what they were doing. 

What do you think about frozen embryos?  Is that ethical?  Do they have souls?  If they grow up, will they ponder what age they would have been?  Do you know any children who were frozen embryos? Would you adopt one if you could handle a pregnancy?