Day Off, Finally

 I’m tired!  

Today was not only payday but also my first day off in a while. I went to my mom’s house and hit up some garage sales along the way. I also went to two Walmarts. 

Kevin and I had a long talk about how I feel burned out. He said he’s very supportive if I want to get another job, and I know he is- but then I saw my check this morning and it was again very very good. I told Kevin, this is what would happen: 

I would end up caring for another elderly person in their home. I wouldn’t be making as much. Then in X amount of months, the person I take care of will pass away, because that’s what elderly people do. And then, either him and/or our boss will ask me if I can work the next day or something. 

I would just end up back again. So it’s fine. I’m just sick and exhausted. 

My mom asked me what I want for Christmas and I said time off. Before Kevin and I started dating, I got a motel room for four days and just worked on my writing the whole time. I told my mom, if I did that now, Kevin would think I’m leaving him. My mom said, then lock yourself in your daughter’s room when she’s not there. I said, it’s not the same- motel rooms are clean. Mom said then clean your house. She doesn’t get it. An audiobook I have on being a writer lists just checking into a motel somewhere for X amount of time is a valid “writing retreat.”  I could use one. I’d bring my sewing machine too. 

#burnout