I “Kid” You Not 🐐

 You can’t make this stuff up. Today I spent the day in Austin doing my side jobs. There were just more of my favorite ones there and on the way.  But good lord, Austin seemed chaotic today. On my way from Elgin to Pflugerville, apparently there were no actual highways for me to take, and my gps took me on a wild goose chase down this two lane country ass road with absolutely nothing. A red SUV started tailgating the hell out of me so I sped up a little until I was going about 15 over the speed, and she was still on my ass. I said that’s it, I’m not speeding any more for her. She can pass me when the opportunity arises. But it never did. It was not only just constantly a double yellow line, but sharp curves in the road that had posted speeds of only 20. There was no way people, including myself with red on my tail, was only going to do 20. It was scary and irritating. This woman was very intimidating. 

Then, out of nowhere, I go around a sharp curve and a herd of about 10-12 goats start crossing the street. They just moseyed on by as if they owned the road!  Maybe they did. I slowed down for them almost to a complete stop, and the woman in the red SUV tailgating me must not have seen that I was slowing down for a dozen goats, because she angrily swerved into the other lane to pass me, even though it was a double yellow line. She came within an INCH of hitting one of the goats. I honked my horn and the goat that she almost hit gave her his own little “F You” by doing this little skippity run with his back legs and going “Baaa!” At that point, I am pretty sure I heard her car stall. She moved over more to the left, out of oncoming traffic, but didn’t pass me. Something happened that incapacitated her, maybe, because she didn’t pass me even after the goats were out of the road. She just stayed there. When the goats crossed I just drove on. It was a good thing she didn’t actually hit the goat, then I probably would have had to called the cops. 

I really really hate being tailgated on like that, especially when I’m speeding up to get the person off my tail. It makes me feel paranoid like someone is after me. It almost makes me feel like someone wants to pull a Princess Diana on me.